Friday, September 02, 2005

Junior Year Musings

Yes, that's right: junior year. How did that happen? On the one hand, I feel like college is passing by faster than I would like; on the other hand, I realize that I have at least 3 more years (an extra year to finish my IR major) ahead of me, so I'm not even halfway done yet. Regardless, I simply need to make the most of it, and then there'll be nothing to regret, right? If only that were true...

I've only had 4 days of class, but I already know which one will be the best: Topics on AI and Computer Game Programming. Honestly, how could I not like a course entitled that? Two of my main interests combined into one class? And, on top of that, it's taught by a professor who clearly is a gamer and enjoys games as much as I do? Can it get any better? I submit that it can not! However, a close contender is my lone IR course entitled Rise and Decline of Empires. It's designated as "writing intensive" but only entails a 5-10 page paper at the end of the course, because it is taught by my favorite professor at Lehigh, and he's anything but conventional. The class will more or less be very similar to my IR course last semester, which was structured as a seminar where we would discuss the day's assigned reading assignment, along with any relevant, tangential topics. Since I find this set-up the most effective and engaging way to teach a contemporary issue, I loved the course I took last semester and will surely enjoy its facsimile this year.

With the amount of time that exists outside of classes, I've had to find activities to occupy that leisure time. And I have in spades. Currently, I'm an active member in 6 clubs, and an officer in 4 of them. Additionally, I do improv on Wednesday nights, regularly attend a student-faculty mixer in the Humanities Center on Friday afternoons called Winddown, play in a D&D game once a week (although that might change, i.e. increase), and go out with friends on the weekends and whenever else I can. Of course, this leads to the opposite problem: too much to do and no time to do it. Surprisingly, except in a few cases where my homework load was exceptionally high, it hasn't been a serious issue yet, but it does have the potential to become one. Next semester, I may have to consider conducting a triage and figuring out which activities I can afford to miss and which I can't. If it comes to that, that will be extremely painful, so let's hope it won't be necessary.

Now, if I'm doing all of these things, how do I have the time to type up this entry? Well, the semester has just begun, so my workload is minimal at the moment. Also, I don't play computer games as much at Lehigh as I do at home, so that frees up a lot of time, although I did beat a fantastic PS2 game called God of War earlier this week. Furthermore, classes never start earlier than 10 am for me, so I can stay up later than I normally would on a weeknight.

I must say, it really is great to be back. Here, because of my full schedule, I feel like I'm accomplishing a great deal, even if, in the grand scheme of my life, at best, it's merely preparation for more significant effects I'll have on the world in the future. Still, without these experiences, I would not be the person that I want to be (and maybe already am to a lesser extent): an active, concerned, and (ideally) well-informed citizen trying to make the best out of a mostly grim reality for much of the world.

Yet, something is missing: a female companion for all of this. Until I find someone to fill this void (wow, I'm unoriginal), I shall always be slightly unsatisfied, always slightly discontent. I wish I could stop being selfish and just learn to happily live a celibate lifestyle, but I'm afraid that's not possible for me. I've made attempts at starting a relationship, but they've been tentative and half-hearted. This needs to change. But, for now, I must live moment to moment, focusing on the overwhelming positive in my life. Love must wait.

No comments: