Looking Over the Horizon

What a strange summer this has been. I graduated, went to Europe for 6 weeks, and spent the rest of the time at home, unemployed for the first time since high school. And while I've enjoyed all the free time, I've gotten anxious, thinking I should be acting more productive (emphasis on the word "acting"). I did manage to force myself into the SU library to begin some preliminary research on my honors thesis. Admittedly, I only stayed there for an hour, but it's a start.

And then, as always, there's the future. But now, it looms more ominously than in the past. Presently (see what I did just there?), I'm increasingly aware of how much my life will change between now and this time next year. Theoretically, I'll be fully employed, maybe on another coast (or not, if I do end up in the government or some other East Coast job), and out of my house for good (disregarding the occasional visit). Of course, I'm taking for granted that I'll be successful in my job search, but given all the factors in my favor (3 winters and summers of experience in IT, good academic record, several leadership roles; not all through my own doing, just to be clear), I'll have only myself to blame if I fail. True, my first job out of college may not be the perfect hybrid utilization of my computer science and international relations majors, but the demand for computer scientists is so high that I can't imagine I won't get a job at least in that field.

But the idea that this summer is probably my last free summer of my youth has hit me like a sucker punch. What am I doing sitting in my house? I should be hanging out with my friends, or exploring Ocean City's nightlife, or going on a road trip, or doing something I can't do once I start my career! Ultimately, inertia has maintained its iron grip, and I've been either at my computer or in front of my TV watching Monty Python's Flying Circus. I'll be going to the beach tomorrow with friends, so if this is my last summer at home, at least that'll be among my final experiences here.

And Tuesday, I'll be eagerly awaiting my copy of BioShock, which I expect will completely engross me (is that a valid phrase?) and leave me with little time for anything else. What this means is, on Monday, I need to inventory my stuff so that I know what I'm missing for college. That way, I can spend as much time with BioShock as I'd like (yes, I do plan my life around video games; feel free to judge me). I'd also like to finish a couple of books before going back to Lehigh. As I'm already more than halfway through both books, perhaps I can finish them up during breaks from BioShock. Thursday, I'm packing up, and Friday, it's back to Lehigh for one final year. And I mean it this time!* So that's my outline for the week. In the meantime, I hope to forget that my school year will consist of juggling working on my honors thesis (interesting, but a lot of work) and attending career fairs (... nope, no upside here).


* That's a joke on the fact that I've technically already graduated from Lehigh but I'm going back for a fifth year. Everyone knows that jokes are funnier when you have to explain them!