Inner Monologue

The following is terrible and should only be read by those who want to see how sad I am. I figure that it's possible that some of you have had similar feelings, so maybe this will help you. If not, I apologize for subjecting you to this.

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"Hey there."
"... Oh, hey."
"What's the matter?"
"Oh, nothing. Just feeling a little down, is all."
"Why?"
"Nothing big, just the little things. My eye's an unstoppable faucet; I'm single and miserable because I don't see a feasible alternative that wouldn't compromise my principles; I hate that I can't be happy with my life; I feel like a terrible person. You know, the usual."

"Huh, that's quite a lot to take at once. Is it possible that you're being too impatient?"
"I guess, but that doesn't change the present."
"Yeah, but don't you think a better outlook on the present could improve your attitude?"
"... maybe."
"And don't you think your concerns are pretty trivial, compared to those of almost everyone else?"
"I know, and that's part of why I feel so terrible! I can't stop feeling sorry for myself, as much as I want to."
"Yes you can. You simply won't allow yourself to stop."
"What? How can you say that? You don't know me!"
"Actually, I AM you."
"Oh... good point. All right, I'm listening."

"Look, you're being short-sighted. How old are you? Assuming no major surprises, you're probably not even done with a third of your life. You have so much time left, and you're merely frustrated that everything isn't the way you want it to be now. But believe me; it WILL be. As long as you commit yourself to being the person you want to be, it will happen."
"But how do I do that?"
"Man, do I have to explain everything to you? All right, for starters, take it one day at a time! For example, that eye problem? Yeah, it's annoying, and it sucks, but in your brain, you KNOW it's temporary. Once you realize that, you can learn to tolerate it until, one way or another, it goes away."
"Ok, that's one problem. What about the rest?"

"Well, you shouldn't be upset that you're single. You know why you're single, and it's nothing to be ashamed of. At worst, you're being a bit picky, waiting to find that someone who has all the qualities you're looking for and is also compatible with your lifestyle."
"But maybe if I took some risks, I would find that I've already met that someone."
"Perhaps. You're just going to have to figure that out for yourself."
"Gee, thanks."
"Hey, most of life's mysteries don't have an easy answer. Get used to it."
"Fine, fair enough. So what should I do in the meantime?"

"Live! Get out there and meet people! And when you can't or don't feel up to doing that, focus on your studies and your hobbies. You can't let the pressures of the short-run distract you from the long-run. Wasting your potential and your privilege by getting caught up in the petty details of life would be a disgrace to everything you believe in. So don't do it! *slap*"
"Ow! How'd you do that? You're just a disembodied version of myself! You don't even have arms!"
"Shut up, and stop questioning the inconsistencies of this narrative's premise! Still, at least your sense of humor seems to be returning. That's a step in the right direction. Oh, and if you don't want to feel like a terrible person, start doing the things you think you should be doing. If you're not helping people enough, start helping people!"
"Wow, that makes a surprising amount of sense. Ok, I think I'm ready to get back on track."

"'Atta boy, I knew you had it in you! Just don't forget that we had this conversation; I know you can be pretty forgetful."
"Don't worry; I've been transcribing every word into my blog."
"Won't people think you're whiny, pathetic, and emo?"
"That may be, but at least I don't listen to emo music."
"Yeah, you keep telling yourself that Radiohead and My Chemical Romance are upbeat."
"Hey!"
"Whoops, sorry, can't talk now, time to go! Nice chat!"